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Awareness and Acceptance: A Path Back to Self

Yesterday I commented on an exceptional post at PTSD – A Way Out. The post suggested an exercise to develop Awareness and Acceptance as a path to healing.

The exercise was simply to bring Awareness to any area of one’s life containing Guilt without allowing the Self to be consumed by the emotions, thus promoting Acceptance of the full Self.

Being a survivor of PTSD, I know full-well this is not an easy thing to do. Not easy, but necessary for healing.

For one thing, one’s life can seem consumed with guilt, which makes it difficult – almost impossible – to identify a single area on which to focus. For another, the emotions can be so overwhelming they can trigger the self-defeating thought cycles we know all too well. Having said that, let me reiterate the importance and validity of this sort of exercise when you’re healing – set aside the time, do it.

Without this sort of exercise and the discipline developed through them, I’m certain I wouldn’t be here to live my life or write this blog. Becoming aware and accepting of myself has allowed me to get back on track to the person the trauma almost stole from me.

Get back to yourself – get a little ‘exercise’ today!

Know How to Play

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “It is a happy talent to know how to play.” What a wise man. Play is an essential part of a happy life. Look around you at the people who are genuinely happy, relaxed and content with their lives. With very few exceptions (if any), you will find those people know how to play, to be silly, to have fun.

I must admit I am guilty, at times, of forgetting how to play. Have you forgotten how to play? Do you know when you stopped playing? I don’t. It just seemed that one day I awakened to the realization that I no longer played. Why do we forget to play? Why does it become unimportant or unfashionable to play? Many questions to which we may never find the answers.

So try this – take out your calendar and find a block of time (at least an hour) when you can promise to do ‘nothing.’ Now, decide where to do this ‘nothing.’ Maybe alone in a park, or at home with the children or pets or spouse will be the best place. Where is not important; what is important is that the place is someplace you are comfortable doing ‘nothing.’ Then, let nature take its course…before you know it, you will be playing with each other, whether it’s a game of peek-a-boo with the baby or tug-of-war with the dog or swinging alone on the swings at the park and your stress will melt away almost magically.

Remember to include crafting in your definition of play as you continue to explore this phenomenon. Remember, finger painting and string art and coloring? It’s not that big of a stretch to canvas art and crochet and knitting – take a class, dig out those hooks and needles, crayons and coloring books, relax – PLAY a little every day!!!

Waste not, want not

Waste not, want not

A phrase I’ve heard all of my life is ‘waste not, want not.’ When I was younger, I found it hard to understand but as I’ve matured, I’ve come to understand it quite well. Basically, it means to conserve what you have now (waste not) so when you need it, you’ll have it (want not). Upon doing a bit of research, it appears the phrase originated in Yorkshire, which makes it seem even stranger to me that it was one of my German mother’s favorite sayings. She was, indeed, a woman of many mysteries.

Along the lines of conservation and not being wasteful, I have a quick recipe to share with you to save those apples (and other fruit) on the verge of spoilage. In these days of tight budgets and frugal living, there’s no need to throw away things that can be used in different ways. We all have had the experience of realizing the apples (peaches or pears) have been sitting on the counter a few days too long to be enjoyed fresh but not quite long enough to be quite rotten. I have good news! You can use the following recipe to create a quick dish to serve as a sweet side with dinner or as a sauce for ice cream or pound cake as dessert:

Cinnamon Fruit

Peel, seed and slice the fruit
Place in a skillet with a dollop of butter over medium-low heat
Add one to two tablespoons of liquid per 4 pieces of fruit (water or apple juice works as well as white wine – your choice)*
Add cinnamon and sugar to taste*
Cover and cook the mixture down until the fruit is tender and a nice sauce has developed (stir occasionally)
Serve warm
*Adjust liquid and seasonings based on amount of fruit

This is one of my favorite comfort foods of all times. There’s something about the butter and the cinnamon melding with the warm fruit flavors that signals ‘all is well’ on the home front. This is a particularly powerful and important message for anyone who struggles with depression and/or PTSD. Something as simple as the methodical preparation of a simple dish like this Cinnamon Fruit can calm the soul and save the day when one is a bit frazzled or fragmented after a challenging day.

Calming rituals involving repetitive, rhythmic activity such as cooking, crocheting, painting, playing music, knitting, and drawing can all be invaluable in bringing peace to the chaotic thought processes that can create havoc for those of us suffering. Find something that works for you and spend time every day to nurture yourself…to heal yourself…break the cycle.

Enjoy your day, enjoy your cinnamon fruit and come visit again soon!

To Resolve, or Not to Resolve, That is the Question….

Yes, it’s January. Yes, it’s the New Year. So, yes, it seems like it’s the natural time to start making those pesky resolutions everyone seems to be talking about all around you; but, maybe not.

I, for one, believe setting a few goals for the New Year makes more sense than making a laundry list of resolutions that I know, from the get-go, I will not keep. So, how shall we go about this task?

First, keep it simple. Let’s not try to conquer the world. Start with a list of no more than a dozen (one a month average) goals.  Whittle that down to no more than eight (2/3 per month average) with six (1/2 per month average) being optimal to achieve for the entire year. That’s right, we’re talking about minimizing what’s on the list, not maximizing.

Second, prioritize your goals and establish your focus. As you achieve a goal, celebrate, then move onto the next goal quickly. The sense of accomplishment from each achievement will propel you forward with greater momentum as you move forward throughout the year. Some goals run concurrently such as saving money and losing weight because they’re not directly related. However, related goals need to be prioritized dependent on their relationship, e.g., achieving the goal of saving $2,000 for a down payment on a car comes before the goal of buying the car.

Third, give yourself a break if/when you stumble. Remember, having a bad day doesn’t mean you’re having a bad life so if/when your impulses get the better of you, feel free to reset your goal. Start over the next day.

It’s ok to believe in your ability to make your dreams a reality each and every day.

Re-introduction

Although I’ve posted a couple of times already, I’ve decided I need to back up and re-introduce myself. I am a fifty something woman who has been around the block a few dozen times. I am someone who has been lost in the dark and finds her way back each and every day through perseverance, tenacity, a simple daily round and a love for art and creation.

During those trips around the block, I’ve been told repeatedly by many people that I should share my stories, my viewpoints, to help other people through difficult times. Additionally, I have some talent in arts and crafts that many people find interesting and inspirational. Combining the two areas in a blog seems like the best way to reach the most people with a message of hope and recovery while building a platform for my products.

In this blog, we’ll be discussing many topics of daily life from depression and PTSD to current events and housecleaning tips as well as a wide range of arts and crafts from crocheting to painting and gardening to cooking so stay tuned. I’m hoping to reach people who are looking for a simple, common sense approach to life from someone who’s been there; people who are looking for someone who has been in the dark but found a way back to the light.

Through publishing this blog, I want to establish a network of people supporting each other through difficult and good times through positive discourse, while increasing awareness of my product line of inspirational arts and crafts.

Happy New Year 2015!!!

Well,  it’s been about six months since my last (and first) entry here but a lot has happened. I know, excuses, excuses, but, really! A lot has happened! All of that aside (separation, moved twice, health scares, etc.), let’s attempt to get back on track with some inspiration, some craft ideas and maybe a gardening idea or something.

This first day of the year is always a day that fills me with feelings of gratitude – much more so than Thanksgiving does for many people. I think it is because I am always somewhat surprised (pleasantly so) to make it through to another New Year’s Day. Having said that, what am I grateful for besides just another chance at another new year? I am grateful for a beautiful family, wonderful friends, what health I have and the opportunities that come my way to enjoy this life.

Something I’m trying for the first time this year, and invite you to do the same, is a “gratitude jar.” I’m sure many of you have seen this idea shared on Facebook and other sites throughout the year. It’s really very simple; take a pretty jar (something you won’t mind having sitting out) and throughout the year, write down those precious moments when you feel thankful, grateful, humbled, and put those slips of paper in the jar. At the end of the year, gather with your friends and family to share those moments again by reading the papers together. Of course, if you need reminders throughout the year of the good times, the precious moments, feel free to dig in and have a reading session anytime the need arises. Just grab the jar, a good cup of coffee or tea and settle back in your favorite chair with the best reading material in town – your very own gratitude journal, compiled one day at a time!

Before I get away for the day, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the garden. This time of the year is so often a time when we ignore the garden. In fact, many of us downright avoid going anywhere near it! Remember, though, the garden needs love all year around so here are just a few things to think about concerning the garden in January: check any stored bulbs for sprouting or mildew, check the mulch around tender plantings and replenish as needed, review seed catalogs and start planning now, clean houseplants thoroughly and feed with slow-release fertilizer, and water trees and hardy outdoor plants if the season has been dry.

Happy New Year!!!

Introduction

Hello, everyone! I’m very new at this entire writing something to everyone in the world gig. I am not, however, new to public speaking so I’ll just pretend you’re all sitting out there waiting to hear something even remotely useful. Deal?

You might be wondering who the heck I am and why I think I have something to say. Fair enough. I am a middle-aged, ok, a bit past middle-aged woman who has lived life, learned a few things, and thinks it’s about time I shared them before it’s too late. My humor and wit are a bit acerbic at times so if you can’t take the heat, you may want to bring fire retardant or stay out of the kitchen.

What are some of the things I’ve learned? Hmmm, most things are manageable with a bit of well-intentioned humor and backbone, vinegar cleans just about anything, someone else always has it worse than me, and if your stitch count is off you can always start over. Oh, one more thing, a good cup of coffee or tea starts the day off with a better attitude than a cold glass of bad attitude – now that’s just my opinion.

Now, it’s time to get out there and not wait to have a great day but, rather, make it a great day!!!

Let’s visit again later on in the week….